Giving Up Control, It Felt Like Such a Good Idea

And it genuinely did, and usually I don't regret it, in fact I think it was one of my better moves as I trust sir and he makes me happy. And during sex he always knows the right words to say... This is not helping, as right now I'm one horny little puppy and I know he has had a bad day and don't want to ask him if I can orgasm. Fuck nuggets!

That is all. Feel free to have a giggle about this I almost certainly will tomorrow night when we're together.

Fifty Shades of Grey

Please tell me this is a bad joke. No? I've not been able to read the entire thing myself (even my masochism has it's boundaries and I have limits!) but the few exerts I have heard have made my IQ drop and the more I hear about it the less I like. It is basically from what I have heard a "How to" guide to being a bad and abusive dom. Thus making me thrilled that Sir knows his stuff. (In other news we have decided I really need pushing this weekend and both want to know how bruised my tits can get as my arse just doesn't. No really it doesn't! It used to but recently it decided that it doesn't want to any more. Ironclad was the word sir used. But that's another matter.) So I shall be writing for all those possible "Fifty Shade" refugees that stumble across my blog that are new to our dark, beautiful and slightly twisted little world, a proper how it should be done and how not to do it.

Bruised

Hey, so anyway sorry I didn't post anything sooner, things have been a little crazy round here! Anyway so as you know I was on an orgasm ban. I made it through what felt like the longest three days of my entire life! And every second was worth it. But that was then and this is about yesterday!

Yesterday morning we had an empty flat to enjoy, and what started off with a warm up spanking, then moved onto a very mean wooden paddle brush that I own, then moved onto a super stingy flogger, onto a cane, then back to the brush, an over the knee spanking and finally the cane. Now my pain tolerance has been insanely low, but yesterday just pushed every single button, and most of the beating just did not register of pain, the moans and a wet patch that went down to my knees will contest to that! I have not had a chance to check out how black and blue I am yet, but I'll let you know! I've also rediscovered a huge love for nipple clamps something I was never usually able to take before. But the pain was just... exquisite is the only word for it right now.

I'd write more but I really must dash. Will give you all more of an update later in the week. Take care everyone!

Spirit

New Relationship

I'm taking things slowly with this relationship. I have to after the past couple of years, considering the state my heart has been left in, not to mention my trust (which is still currently non-existent but I am working on that). So anyway, I see him about once, maybe twice a week. But my brain is currently going mad and shouting at me to get out before I get hurt as I am getting rather attached to him, and I promised myself that I wouldn't get attached to anyone for a long time. But here I am slowly giving my control up and dare I say it possibly falling for this one. Well I'm off to go and put my butt plug in and record myself having a wank for him as promised. Damn rules! I'm actually enjoying them.

Boyfriend's Hangovers and the Bruise On My Butt

I'm usually sort of a morning person, yes that peppy little cunt who seems to be happy and have energy. I hate those people this morning as I nurse my hangover. Although it must be said, it was totally worth it. But let me back this puppy up a couple of weeks. About three weeks ago, a friend introduced me to one of his friends. we talked a bit and meeting up for a drink was talked about but with me being busy didn't happen for a couple of weeks. Finally met up with him and we went on a date. I explained the past year or so and that I was not looking for a relationship. Which didn't stop us kissing, nor did it stop his hand ending up in my knickers. Very glad I wore a dress on our date. He has been domming me of late, but I'll save those for another post. We've been seeing each other when we've had the chance, and it has been nice. Although my pain tolerance is non-existent these days I have sadly discovered. If anyone finds it there will be a reward.

Last weekend we went for a quick drink before I met up with my friends to go clubbing. We both said non-committal and very not serious, yet he asked me this:

"When you go clubbing, do you, well, tend to pull?" Said with his hand down my jeans I might add. (So not slutty.)
"Sweetheart, I go to get off my face and dance, I have in the past, but it's far from my plan for the evening."
"Oh, ok, cool. Because, well I'd really like it if you didn't." Even I thought that was kind of cute.

So I went clubbing, and didn't pull. Fast forward a few days to yesterday. He came over to mine for the first time, an act of bravery as I always warn people I live in a very cluttered room with a broken bed. (No it didn't get broken doing that.) But he came over, he used my cane on me for the first time. I really didn't take it very, which actually really annoyed me. But, y'know it has been well over a year, I shouldn't be surprised. And that ladies and gentlemen is how I came to get the bruise on my butt. We admitted that we both really like each other, and that we are only playing with (and sleeping with) each other, but we left it at that. We finally got out of bed to get to the pub (seeing where this hangover may have come from now?) and finally ended up introducing people as "his girlfriend" which made a lot more sense than pointing in each other's general direction and saying "that's my erm. Well... S/He's with him." (Delete where appropriate.) So that's how I ended up with a boyfriend. We then went on to another pub, and then finally me and a friend as boyfriend had to get the last train home, went on to yet another place for cocktails. I don't want to know what time my drunk arse got through that door. But I'm feeling better now, and actually, kind of happy. So much for the I'm done with relationships!

12 Months

I have not had a proper play session in thirteen whole months. I've had a few offers, including an invite to a very private rubber play party that is coming up. But I've been turning everyone down, although I haven't turned down the play party. I'm not a rubber person, but I still kind of fancy it. But what puts me off is that I haven't played in so very bloody long and I'm not sure that the first time I play after so long be something so public.

Since the split with Storm (which has been rather stressful) I have wanted to play but I have not really found anyone I have wanted to play with. The guy I'm currently fucking is only very mildly kinky so I don't count what we do as playing in any way. Although there has been a friend of a friend that has asked me out this weekend, he's a couple of years younger than me, which I would never normally go for, and although not unattractive not physically my type. but yet I have found myself agreeing to a date. So hopefully if all goes well maybe I'll have some kinky stroies to share very soon. Much as I like the guy I'm fucking it's been almost a month and he is talking about just being friends so I have to get out before I get hurt.

The Kinky Girl Spirit Guide to Life

So as you know I'm ducking someone at the moment, and we have decided that we don't want anything serious, and it is making me think about the rules that I live by, that stop me getting hurt, keep me safe and out of trouble.

The Kinky Girl Spirit Guide to Life

• Don't get involved with couples. As a one off it can be ok, but never let it become regular.

• Do not keep a fuck buddy for more than a month, one of you is going to end up wanting more and someone will get hurt. 
• If you can help it, avoid them.If the person you are with starts behaving like an arse get out, things will not improve. Man I've learnt that the heard way. Twice.

 I'm sure there should be more, and I'm sure as I get older the list will grow.

Lucky Dip

So I went to an event recently, it was a fantastic night with a kinky edge to it. When I got there I went for a smoke and met a pair of really nice guys, anyway as the night progresses I end up kissing one of them (in truth I kissed two people that night but ya know, who's counting?) anyway so we get talking about kink and it turns out of all the people in the building I find the vanilla who wants to be corrupted. At the end of the night he invites me back to his (well he's pretty damn cute if you ask me) so it would be rude to say no.

We get back to his and his friend crashes in the spare room and we move from the living room to the bedroom, barring a few scratches and the odd very gentle bite the sex was pretty vanilla. We spent the whole of Sunday and Monday together and the sex was pretty damn good. He also asked me to corrupt him so that sort of got the cogs turning in my head. He said he wanted to try bondage but didn't really go much past that.

Now I've been very nervous about getting back into the kink world, considering I haven't played with anyone in really just over a year, and I am really wanting to take things very slow, considering I don't want to get burnt again after all the problems I've had of late.

So somehow I deccide that the first person I am going to play with is someone with no experince, but is very keen to learn. When I got over to his the other day I asked him if he wanted to see what I'd brought recently, the only things that got used were the new rope (which I still keep saying I must cut to lengths I want!) and my lovely new cuffs. He wanted to see what it was like to be tied down before he did any tying (a man after my own heart) so I cuffed and tied him to the bed, teased him, gently biting his nipples, kissing down his body, giving him a blowjob (man that guy's dick gets bigger every time I see it), and finally riding him. After an orgasm or three, I let him go as being tied was not his thing, but he was more than happy cuffing me flipping me over, and fucking the life out of me, dirty talking the whole way. He really did take to domming like a fish to water. But it's early days and we're not too sure where all this is going, we don't want to rush into a relationship so we're taking it slow. But give me time and I'm going to find out everything he's into and I think when I'm done the scene is going to have another excellent dom.

In other news I've got another date coming up. He's a friend of a friend, pretty cute and I must say, I'm rather looking forward to that too.

Sorry for the absence

Well I've been rather quiet of late, giving myself some space from kink, relationships, and if I'm honest physical contact altogether. I've been ill for a really long time. So anyway, I'm ready to start getting back out there and moving on with my life (and about time to, but I'm glad I've had some Spirit time) and on the search for that Goldilox and the three bears "just right" kind of kinky relationship.

So as I sit here enjoying the sunshine, and looking through what the internet has to offer (I don't know if it's the time of year or something, but it's real slim pickings!) or I have finally become so fussy there is no one single out there that I want! Either way, it's all good and I'm having lots of fun, enjoying some very sexy legs, short skirts and with it being the city some cracking heels. If only some of those women could walk in them, maybe I should start giving lessons...

Riding the Storm

So I go and see Storm, he needs someone to talk to, and I know him better than anyone, and I've got closer to him than anyone he's ever known. We end up going back to his and watching a film. He's got an arm aaround me and then it's inside my skirt. The funny thing is I'm wet before he's even touched me. Then his fingers are inside my thong and  rubbing me. I've got his jeans off and I'm wanking him off, he gently pushed my head down over his cock and I'm goiving him a blow job. He's moaning above me and he suddenly decides to move me, picking my up like I weigh nothing. He lays me in front of him and fingers me until I squirt, for the first time in years, and just as I start squirting he's inside me with my legs over his shoulders. I scratch down his chest and thighs leaving dark red trails. And I'm desperately trying not to scream because his housemate is next door. We've almost always orgasm at the same time, but this time I came before him, and just as he came he pulled out covering me in his spunk.

I'll make a kinkster of him yet...

Blast From the Past

So, does anyone remember Mist? Well, he has been back in contact with me. (Who'd have thought it?) He messaged me on a BDSM networking site. He's out of town at the moment but when he gets back would I like to go for a drink? He's so sorry for hurting me, he misses me and he never should have ended it with me. So, does anyone actually believe a word of that? Because I know I don't. He's not back for a few more months but I don't see any drinks happening. Unless of course I go purely to pour the drink over his head. Which I must admit is tempting, if not somewhat childish.

A Change of Direction

So as we all know I'm back to being single again, and have been for a few weeks. I've had my first Valentines Day as a single woman (which felt wonderful as whether single or in a relationship I detest that day!) I have been out with friends a few times, and had plenty of interest from men and women.

Now the woman had a boyfriend, one of the men was just plain weird and it felt like having my own lapdog/sycophant and the others were just not my type. And I'd rather like to overlook the so-called friend trying to set me up with his mate. Five minutes into fooling around with him and I was willing to run a mile in tight shoes just to get away from him.

In the past eighteen months my heart and soul have taken more of a battering than most will in such a short space of time, and I guess it's left me feeling rather cynical lately and a bit on the defensive. Which is really not like me. I used to enjoy having playmates and no strings fun, but it's not what I want any more, the very thought is a turn off and leaves me feeling a bit low oddly enough. When things were at their best with Storm (which sadly was rare) they were amazing and it's showed me a different side to things, and I'd quite like something like that again. So I'm going to wait this one out, be looking for some good free porn sites, and erotic novels to keep myself amused in the mean time and see where it goes.

Getting Back On the Horse

I've been single for a few weeks now. I'm on a couple of kinky dating sites, but I'm getting sick of them already. The only people that seem interested (and already have it in their heads that I must be interested in them) are all twice my age and more. Now I know that some women like that kind of thing, but I want a long term relationship, would a relationship with that big an age gap really last? I doubt myself that it would, I'd rather be with someone my age who I can grow, and potentially grow old with.

But then I have not met anyone that I have been mutually interested in for a long time. There's been a few people show some interest but we want different things, or I'm just not attracted to them. I'm very picky about who I go for.

Drumroll Please

I have had a really busy and crappy couple of months. Long story short I'm back as a single woman again. I've had a horrific shock that there is no one out there I actually want to fuck! Not a single Dom or Domme on the internets! I must write a letter to my local MP complaining about this matter...

So I have got to invest in a good vibrator. If anyone knows of a good one please do let me know.

In other news I plan to be back again on a regular basis with my usual dirty stories and updating you on my latest adventures. And it's been a long time (too long) it was great to see there are now a grand total of 21 people subscribing to the blog!

So since I hate to dissapoint my fans I'll be posting a new story within the next few days.

Love to you all

Spirit x

The Blowjob

So things between me and Storm are back on track. And without me doing anything too stupid while we were on the rocks! So I've been with him this past few days and things are much more like they used to be. Although he was a bit worried with these meds he's on that he wouldn't be able to get it up. And oh yeah yours truely defeated the medication! When I want it up by hook or by crook I'm going to get it up! What can I say, maybe I have a gift...

Anyway, he's not a fan of sex while I'm on the rag but if you'd spent four hours without being able to get the thought of giving your partner a blowjob then you really have to do something about it. Besides he can return the favour later down the line. So we're curled up in bed after a bit of a shitty day and I can hear it's getting to him. We've atempted to watch a film but talked over most of it. Largely him calling me a nymphomaniac, personally I want a second opinion! So I run my hands down his body and start to kiss his neck and down his body and I can feel him getting hard in my hand. His breathing changes, and I work my way down his body until he is in my mouth. I lick, kiss and suck him as he runs his fingers down the arm I am supproting my weight with and through my hair. I'm getting so wet I can barely concentrate until I hear his breathing quicken, trying to keep quiet with someone in the next room, and then he doubles over with orgasm, holding onto my head as he just seems to keep cumming in my mouth.  Finally his orgasm is over and we curl up in each other's arms.

The Great Unanswered Question

So Storm went a bit weird and I have taken a step back as my life has been... Well I was almost an obituary lets leave it there. He went weird before that. Ex weird, she started seeing someone else and he got weird. But this is where it gets interesting.

I had to go to work the other night and I really didn't want to be there, my bosses knew the score and we decided to just put me on the door for a bit and then I can just bum around and be around friends. (I work at a kinky sex club once a month.) I then end up as a bit of a newbie meeter and greeter. I'm young, (apparently) attractive, friendly and know most of the club to some degree. So I'm an obvious choice. And I get talking to these guys and one just stuck with me the whole night, I almost cried on his shoulder about my current state of affairs and he was so sweet.He cuddled me and while I worked the door sat at my feet and stroked my ankles. We talked sport, music, films, tv the lot. And my mad life didn't freak him out. When I was off the door we sat in a quiet corner, ended up kissing and at the end of the night exchanged numbers and agreed to go for coffee. Now he more or less knows my insane life with something constantly going all kinds of wrong/crazy. And he still wants to see me again. Now we haven't spoken since, and so the great unanswered question...

When is too soon to text them?

Now I'm really still broken up about Storm in a huge way. In fact I've hardly eaten and only left bed for work since it all went tits up. But this is a great guy. Well so far. And is coffee really ok? Storm and me are technicall still together but he's not being fair on my feelings, and last night that attention just made me feel so much better. Ok, my brain hurts.

Holy Crap!

So it's like eight o'clock in the morning, we've been out clubbing all night and the night before. And we are trashed, and exhausted, we ache, and finally we have stripped off and crawled into bed. We are already sweaty and gross and really should just be going to bed. Well we're in bed, that's close enough right?

He puts his arms around me and kisses me, and his hands run all over my body, and his fingers find my already wet cunt, and are inside me making me moan into his shoulder as I kiss it. My hands are all over his body and then he pulls me on top of him. I slide him inside me and his hands are all over my chest, strong but soft. My eyes lock onto his as I ride him until I am biting my lip to stop from screaming the entire flat down around me. I orgasm and it feels like my entire body has gone off like a rocket and I collapse on top of him totally breathless. He rolls me onto my back and it all gets a little hazy from there. When it is over we lay gasping for breath in each other's arms and nuzzle each other. The next thing I know it's some time in the afternoon.

Sex with Storm is way more addictive than crack, fizzy cola bottles and anything else I can think of! I've not been able to concentrate at work!

Unnatural, I Swear

I should be fully capable of having dirty thoughts of people that are not Storm. It is after all only a thought, so far I have discovered that actually I can't. This is not right it's unnatural. It's at the very least unfair. So what does this mean? I used to date a guy that said that I was the only person he would have dirty thoughts about. I thought he was bullshitting. Maybe he was telling the truth. Then again we've only been together for a month and a half so it may be just that... Nah even after a week into a relationship I could have dirty thoughts about certain athletes. Well ordinarily anyway. So sorry from now on it's going to be nothing but stories of Storm and I. Even if it is just dirty thoughts. But only when I'm finally comfortable that he is the only person I am capable of having dirty thoughts about.

Vertigo of Bliss

Now I've been quiet lately, and I was thinking why have I had less to say, is it the not having time? Partly. Is it that for the past two weeks and for the next two Advent have had and wil have my laptop fixing my screen for the second time. You'd have thought they'd have fixed it right the first time or just given me a properly working screen to start with. Slightly that, and I apologise for my rant. Or is it that I am enjoying the sex with Storm so much it makes my brain go fuzzy and I find it hard to remember enough to write about. Yeah, a lot, muchly and uh huh with enthusiastic noddings. There will be empty flat fun to talk share with you all next week.

Love and light to you all

Spirit

One Way Traffic

I hate oral sex.

Ok hate is a really strong word, but I don't let anyone get their head "down there" as it were. Funnily enough though get me on the giving end and you can almost guarantee my knickers will be soaking before they've cum. And I love sucking Storm's cock. I even like the taste of his cum. Good thing too seeing as the last time he came in my mouth I had to swallow twice!

A few weeks ago I had given him a blow job and I was all kinds of horny, he had cum in my mouth and had no idea at the time that blowjobs turned me on so much. Until he saw the damp patch where I had gotten so wet I'd soaked through my underwear. But he decided to make me wait, until finally he pulled my underwear off pulled me on top of him and he slid inside me. He pulled me onto him and a wave of bliss came over me. I swear that thing is a perfect fucking fit! He kissed my nck, shoulders and gently sucked my nipples and  I rode him until I was screaming, but he was nowhere near done with me. He pulled me up like a ragdoll, bent me over the nearby desk and fucked me until I was fighting to keep my knees from buckling. He came inside me and pulled me back to the sofa and held me in a tangle of limbs, and kissed me and ran his fingers through my hair and down my cheek, my arms and up and down my spine.